I hate this……argh
Feeling down since the day b4….Waiting for this mood swing syndrome to pass but til now..failed!
Feel mad and disapointed to myself after the dreadly CSU session the day before. Felt like a super idiot who is completely loss in the situation. Cant even performed a simple physical examination. What is wrong with me??? I did study before the session and i thought i was prepared for it….eventhough not fully prepared but i thought at least i can complete the examination…but then i failed!!!!! Is TS too advance for our level? I doubt so coz the rest of them who were with me that day can answer his question. So what can be the problem?? Maybe really my brain is just like a mega sieve that filter out everything..More irony is that i still get A for that system!!! Maybe jus as he said the A of mine is nothing but an accident!!Well…i started to believe that it is true….
Feeling disappointed to oneself is a terrible feeling. I hate that. What add salt to the injuries is that i got no 1 to confide to. Things had not change better even after i got my Respi result…ya better than what i expected but then again i started to question myself..is this what i deserve? or maybe i deserve a B o what which suit my level better….For the 1st time getting a good result doesn’t brighten up my day:(
Every ppl had different expectation to themselves…I got my own as well and i thought i got the right to feel stress if i cant meet my own expectation..but to the others this may not be the case… To them , getting a A means u had no right to feel stress and u got no right to complain about how hard u had tried to meet ur own target. Even when u failed to meet ur own target u still cannot show how depressed u r and u r not allow to cry coz u r an A student who got no right to feel stress!!! Hate to show smiley face to others when im in a terribly bad mood…but hey i got no right to pull a long face remember?? coz i got an A…..:(
" No matter what happens, to me u r alr the best" …This is what u told me when i complain about how stressed up im recently…U are the only one who knew that im in a bad shape by just listening to my voice…thanks a lot for that, it really means a lot to me…Still there is always some1 who can understand me. How i hope ur just by my side when i need assurance and encouragement.
I know that this is just part and parcel of a learning process and i need to learn to cope with it…in fact im trying hard to do so..but it is quite a tough task esp when i got to do this alone….
I hate this feeling…..
October 6th, 2006 at 2:29 am
dun worry, just work harder and u can make it. honestly i cant remember wat i studied for sem3 as well now. tht’s bad..
October 6th, 2006 at 9:50 am
seriously, u gotta believe more in urself. some stuff may not appear like that obvious or fully-interpretable right now, but maybe later on after the system when u actually think back about it, u realise that it is actually quite simple. u scored an A, and this is not because of pure luck, it is because u studied hard for it =) not everything might turn up the way u had expected it to, but hey, u’ve done ur best and i think thats wat that matters the most.. have confidence, i believe in u, and i believe all ur close buddies feel that same =) life is full of surprises, but i guess thats what makes it challenging rite? =) if ya ever do need help plsss dun hesitate to ask, i’m jus one sms away k! smile always!
October 6th, 2006 at 11:01 am
hey look, TS loves patronizing students, so him telling you that you dont deserve that A is total nonsense okay? cause you absolutely do deserve it. the fact that you have gotten an A shows how much you have worked for it, so just dont be bothered about what other people- who definitely do not understand your position- get to you, ok? and it is absolutely bollocks that you are not allowed to feel stressed or even show it just because you are an A student, in fact it’s most probably the stress that drives most of us on. everyone feels stress, it’s just how we tackle it that makes a big difference. and about problems, remember what you told me last time? if we just keep it in, it’ll never go away… seriously, you’ve got so many friends around you. we’re all surely willing to listen to what you have got to say, and we’ll even lend you a shoulder to cry on, if you really must cry your problem away. whatever works, works…. ok? so brighten up! =) you’re not alone in all this, we’re all here for you when you need us. remember that. =)
October 6th, 2006 at 10:41 pm
hey ya…no stress, no life, girl…
some stress is good for our immune system…
ahh, bah~
u’re an A student if u think u are…and that’s what matters…
plus, i think you ARE!
October 7th, 2006 at 8:38 am
Having high expectations is really good to motivate someone but i don’t think it’s good when it starts to pressure u a lot…It would be like an “adverse effect of a drug”..no good no good…Trust me..If u have already done ur best, try not to blame urself for not knowing something cos noone in this world knows everything…maybe recently u’re sick..sick ppl cant really perform well.. so this explains why u werent in top shape during ts’s session right?and how come u cant confide in me?is it because i don give u the right to confide?i think certainly no right?although i didn’t get A but i do still think that A’s student had right to be stressed up too cos i’m a occasional A student..hehe..come on…cheer up!!
October 9th, 2006 at 5:18 am
thanks 4 all de encouragements..give me more time to settle my emotion and hopefully i can do it…N to those who are affected by my mood….a Big sorry to all!!!